* kristen was moved out of the icu today and in room 532 at Penn Presbyterian. this is a good thing. still unable to accept calls and visitors, but i read blog posts and emails to her throughout the day.
* her vitals were stable, though temp spiked to 102 for much of the afternoon and heart rate was back up around 120bpm for that period.
* still puzzling over the mouth sores though they've effectively ruled out thrush (thanks Sonya for mentioning that!) and have taken cultures for MRSA and herpes. though it's an odd presentation, there is some thought it's the same strepA bug.
* 3d debridement is scheduled for noon tomorrow. it will not be the last.
* kristen's parents arrived this afternoon. (thanks to cooperative traffic and bold navigation, i pulled of the logistical feat of dropping off mae at dance class at 4.30, picking up ron and linda at the airport just before 5 and getting back to see the end of mae's ballet practice at 5.30.) they were by kristen's side by 6.30 as i had promised her they would be and it was a good thing i did. she had a long hard day of being mostly alone and in another new place.
each day is tough.
in spite of all the encouraging signs about kristen's treatment, she doesn't get much rest from the pain, loneliness and worry. there are surgeries to endure, tests to undergo and long days of of stiffness and discomfort. she still can't eat normal food because of the sores in her mouth and that is really pissing her off. she is in a fog from the dilaudid much of the time and her only option is to skip a dose (she self medicates with a maximum dosage limit by pressing a small button) while enduring the pain for a few lucid moments. she does this frequently and i selfishly enjoy it. it doesn't take long though for me to encourage her to go ahead and rest again. i move her leg. i hold her leg. i cry on her leg. i hold her hand. seeing a familiar face settles her and keeps her sane. that's why i am so happy her parents are sitting with her right now. they are gentle, beautiful people.
i hope they get to the bottom of her mouth sores. i will be surprised if it's anything other than the identical strep strain that has polluted her whole system. the sores are weeping and look to my naive eyes like dying bacteria overrun by strong white blood cells. i think she is winning the fight.
Dearest Kristen I think about you non-stop. It is hard to find the words to say how brave I think you are, and how much I wish this ordeal was over for you. I know you are strong; so are Ben, Mae and Clara. Soon enough we will all be having adventures again...but maybe not in the snow... I'm thinking somewhere nice and warm... Until then, know that you are in my heart, thoughts and prayers. Love you. V
ReplyDeleteYeah!! with reservations, but Yeah!!
ReplyDeleteI have my ticket and will be there soon to relieve and hopefully bring some renewed energy. I am sure Kristen's spirit is better with Ron and Linda there.
And although there may be times of loneliness, remind Kristen that she is surround by love from coast to coast.
With love, Jen
Ben, Kristen, Mae, and Clara, Steffani and I pray for you daily. Steffani has two groups at our church holding you in prayer. She is also doing a novena for you.
ReplyDeleteMay God bless you and keep you.
May his face shine upon you and may he be gracious to you.
May he show you kindness and give you peace. (Numbers 6:24-26)
Kristen. I love you. You are doing an outstanding job facing this. Really. I know you feel beaten down but you are brave to fight hard like you are. So many people love you. We are all sending big smoochie kisses and hugs hugs hugs from SPACET. Love your big sister, Tara
ReplyDeleteKristen,
ReplyDeleteWoods
by Wendell Berry
I part the out thrusting branches
and come in beneath
the blessed and the blessing trees.
Though I am silent
there is singing around me.
Though I am dark
there is vision around me.
Though I am heavy
there is flight around me.
Keep fighting. You have the strength and love of many.
Ben, stay strong too. You have a hard job. I love you both. rebecca
kristen will be so happy today to hear all your kind words.
ReplyDeleteA long day, but a great day with Kristen being moved out of ICU and with her parents arriving. AND, an amazing husband and dad who accomplishes enormously impressive logistical feats involving dance class, airports and little girls. Remarkable!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure it doesn't seem to Kristen like there's a whole lot of progress, but it sounds like there is ... one bit at a time. And that's so heartening for all of us.
Hang in there and know that there are good things ahead. Just keep pushing for them, as I know you are. We're all thinking of you!!
Paula
We're so happy that Kristen is out of ICU. It's a positive sign...something to build on. You are an amazingly strong and courageous woman, Kristen. You are surrounded with love and prayers from all over the world. I can say this...my friends in Dubai and Mexico are praying for you. Each day brings new hope and renewed strength. Ben, you have been Kristen's rock...so much support, courage, tenderness and love. Know that you are all in our hearts, and our prayers, and our thoughts every single moment. Love, Suzie & Thom
ReplyDeleteI just want to thank you again for these blog posts, Ben. I am thinking of Kristen and you and Mae and Clara constantly, and I hope you all know how many people are out here praying for you and thinking about you.
ReplyDeleteKristen, I can't imagine what you're going through. But anyone who can dodge prisoners in orange jumpsuits and cops as she's giving birth can do just about anything!
I know progress seems slow, but someday soon this will be just another hospital story, like that one. I can see that so clearly for you; just keep your eyes on the day when you're back with your girls, watching them sing and dance and laugh. We will all do everything we can to get you back to that place as soon as possible.
Again, both of you, please don't hesitate to call if I can do anything to help. I'm at your disposal!
Stay strong, my friend. You are in my thoughts constantly.
My love and prayers go out to you - Erin
Kristen and Ben, long days, precious times, I love you both. So many wonderful folks sending you love, what a community of support. Everyday, some good news, everyday hope and struggle. Everyday I and so many others pray for your continued strength and recovery from you pain and ordeal. I'm happy to hear your parents are there with you, I also am praying for them. Kristen and Ben, be strong, and feel the love of all around you. You are amazing and beautiful. Love, mom
ReplyDeleteBen, are you able to check kristendegroot@yahoo.com? I don't have your e-mail address, so I just sent something there.
ReplyDeleteBest,
Erin
erin, plz forward to bendegroot@yahoo.com - thanks!
ReplyDeleteDear Ben,
ReplyDeletePlease let Kristen know I am sending tons of love and positive energy from Illinois to Philadelphia. I cannot imagine how scared and tired and pained she is right now, but I know with the love and support of all her amazing family and friends that she will come through this probably much sooner than her doctors expect. She is one of the stongest, most spirited friends I have, and I know she's going to be OK.
You are doing an amazing job balancing everything, but I'm so glad you have even more family in town now to help with the girls and to spend time with Kristen. Mae and Clara sound like wonderful little troopers -- but what would I expect, with such a great mama and papa to model themselves after?
I'm actually heading out now to donate blood, the first time I've made a donation in years. But your earlier post about Kristen's transfusion made me realize it's one small thing I can do to try to feel useful.
Please tell Kristen I miss her, I love her, and once she feels better, she's going to have to endure a long phone conversation with me where I tell her all about her awesomeness over the phone!
Much love,
Tara Burghart
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ReplyDeleteDear Kristen and Ben, another co-worker, Rosanne and long time friend of Vivian's asked that I let you know she and her family arel be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteWe are all united, sending you healing light energy. May it course through you, leaving no room for decay, may if fill your body with powerful energy to heal, and may it give your spirt happiness and joy. Love, mom